Friday, May 20, 2011
Half way around the world and a BFN to show...
Well, not entirely true, Franklin and I got to go to Brugge and Paris and meet my incredible IPs. So, really, it was not for nothing but the main purpose was to get pregnant and that just didn't happen. I am sad but hopeful for the next cycle. I can't focus on the negative too long. It is my coping mechanism I guess. I like to look forward as quickly as possible when things don't work out. So, it appears I will head back to Belgium in 3 weeks or so. My IPs have some frozens we will be using. I am excited at the thought of another cycle and am going to give it my all like always. We had discussed possibly having the embryos shipped here but the problem with that is the clinic must follow FDA guidelines and I am pretty sure a clinic in Belgium isn't going to do that. They have VERY strict guidelines but they aren't TECHNICALLY FDA approved, I don't believe. Either way, it would be expensive and time consuming to ship them so it seems to make more sense to make a whirlwind trip to Belgium and this time, GET PREGGO!!! We will see what God has in store. I know he has a plan.
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Transferred and feeling good!
It has been 4 days that we have been in Belgium. It has been a fantastic experience. My IPs are fabulous and have shown us an unimaginable time. I am actually quite humbled by the many kind gestures.
On Saturday while Frank and I were navigating from the airport to the hotel, my IM was having her retrieval. They were able to get 10 eggs! I was very happy to hear the report and know that we were on track for a 3day transfer. Yesterday was the big day. We had visited the clinic a couple days before for some blood work so I had at least seen the facility before the transfer. Things were so very different from the U.S. Instead of this being just a clinic, this was an actual hospital. There was of course, the fertility wing which is where we would be having our procedure done. Upon arriving the morning of the transfer I had to have more bloodwork done. It seems Belgium is very strict on testing and things of that nature. I think you can never be too careful, so why not? They are very regulated there because healthcare is basically ran by the government in that country. I also had to speak with the psychologist and was told it was just a formality. The psychologist was very nice and informed me that the clinic does NOT do surrogacy. It seems I was their first. She stated they may have done others, but not knowingly. I think it is a pretty awesome honor to be the first known surrogate at that clinic. Everyone was so very nice there. I was amazed at how everyone speaks English with no problem. You can basically choose what language you want a person to speak to you there. One difference I noticed right away was that very few of the staff wear "scrubs" or formal uniforms. Everyone was wearing jeans and dressed very casual. It was funny to see that for some reason. Also, one of the gentlemen had marlboros just hanging out of his pocket. It was so interesting the differences between the U.S. and this clinic in Belgium. Once Frank and I were done speaking with the psychologist, Ips and I were required to sign paperwork that really did not at all pertain to surrogacy but it was basically all they had. It was initially created for egg donors and recipients. So, we crossed through and made changes and signed. Finally, it was time for the transfer. I was told to go into a hospital room where there were two hospital beds and take all clothes off and put on a hospital gown and a hat to cover my hair. It seemed so over the top compared to the typical US protocal. When they came to take me back I was surprised to enter what I would call a holding room where there were 2 other women waiting to go back for their transfers. They would wheel out one and wheel in another. I was shocked at how many transfers this clinic must actually perform in one day. Once in the "holding room" my husband and IM had to put on their scrubs over their clothing. Hubby looked quite adorable I must say! I was wheeled back to the OR where we were told we had 2 excellent, 8-celled embryos to transfer. 2 would be frozen for IPs' later use. We watched the Dr. place the little embryos into my uterus by ultrasound. We were not shown or given pictures of the embryos as that is not done in this clinic in Belgium. Before leaving the OR I heard the assistant say "pull up your pants...sir your pants." LOL! My hubby had let his scrub pants fall to the floor and didn't realize because he was so involved in comforting me. It was so funny and so cute. He is such an amazing support to me. I am very blessed. Once leaving the OR I was rolled back in the holding room before being moved by rolling hospital bed to the room I started in. I was told to lay there for one hour with legs elevated before being able to leave. IPs went and got us sandwiches and we ate before heading back to the hotel room to take it easy for a day or so. I sit here in awe of the experience I have been a part of. I am blessed and feel full of knowledge that I hope to share with others who may go through something similar for the first time. This whole journey has been a learning experience for me. It has been wonderful and eye opening and I feel I am better person because of it. I am happy to leave Belgium with amazing memories, greater knowledge and hopefully a baby croissant in the oven for my IPs!
On Saturday while Frank and I were navigating from the airport to the hotel, my IM was having her retrieval. They were able to get 10 eggs! I was very happy to hear the report and know that we were on track for a 3day transfer. Yesterday was the big day. We had visited the clinic a couple days before for some blood work so I had at least seen the facility before the transfer. Things were so very different from the U.S. Instead of this being just a clinic, this was an actual hospital. There was of course, the fertility wing which is where we would be having our procedure done. Upon arriving the morning of the transfer I had to have more bloodwork done. It seems Belgium is very strict on testing and things of that nature. I think you can never be too careful, so why not? They are very regulated there because healthcare is basically ran by the government in that country. I also had to speak with the psychologist and was told it was just a formality. The psychologist was very nice and informed me that the clinic does NOT do surrogacy. It seems I was their first. She stated they may have done others, but not knowingly. I think it is a pretty awesome honor to be the first known surrogate at that clinic. Everyone was so very nice there. I was amazed at how everyone speaks English with no problem. You can basically choose what language you want a person to speak to you there. One difference I noticed right away was that very few of the staff wear "scrubs" or formal uniforms. Everyone was wearing jeans and dressed very casual. It was funny to see that for some reason. Also, one of the gentlemen had marlboros just hanging out of his pocket. It was so interesting the differences between the U.S. and this clinic in Belgium. Once Frank and I were done speaking with the psychologist, Ips and I were required to sign paperwork that really did not at all pertain to surrogacy but it was basically all they had. It was initially created for egg donors and recipients. So, we crossed through and made changes and signed. Finally, it was time for the transfer. I was told to go into a hospital room where there were two hospital beds and take all clothes off and put on a hospital gown and a hat to cover my hair. It seemed so over the top compared to the typical US protocal. When they came to take me back I was surprised to enter what I would call a holding room where there were 2 other women waiting to go back for their transfers. They would wheel out one and wheel in another. I was shocked at how many transfers this clinic must actually perform in one day. Once in the "holding room" my husband and IM had to put on their scrubs over their clothing. Hubby looked quite adorable I must say! I was wheeled back to the OR where we were told we had 2 excellent, 8-celled embryos to transfer. 2 would be frozen for IPs' later use. We watched the Dr. place the little embryos into my uterus by ultrasound. We were not shown or given pictures of the embryos as that is not done in this clinic in Belgium. Before leaving the OR I heard the assistant say "pull up your pants...sir your pants." LOL! My hubby had let his scrub pants fall to the floor and didn't realize because he was so involved in comforting me. It was so funny and so cute. He is such an amazing support to me. I am very blessed. Once leaving the OR I was rolled back in the holding room before being moved by rolling hospital bed to the room I started in. I was told to lay there for one hour with legs elevated before being able to leave. IPs went and got us sandwiches and we ate before heading back to the hotel room to take it easy for a day or so. I sit here in awe of the experience I have been a part of. I am blessed and feel full of knowledge that I hope to share with others who may go through something similar for the first time. This whole journey has been a learning experience for me. It has been wonderful and eye opening and I feel I am better person because of it. I am happy to leave Belgium with amazing memories, greater knowledge and hopefully a baby croissant in the oven for my IPs!
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Europe...there are no words!
We are here! Finally! We have made it to Europe. The trip was not too bad at all actually. We had a very long layover in DC and I did my best to sleep on the 7.5 hour flight from DC to Brussels. Hubby and I felt as though we were on the Amazing Race upon arriving. My intended mother had her retrieval around the time we would be arriving so it was up to us to navigate in this new uncharted (at least by us) country. We had to get a train in order to be within walking distance to our hotel. Before doing that, we had to use our debit card to change dollars to euros. It was very neat to get something besides American money out of the ATM. The train alone was a new experience for us. We enjoyed the peaceful rocking motion of the train and observed the scenery. Once we arrived at the train station we attempted to find our way to the hotel. We had been given a map so we did our best to use that and I must say we did pretty well. We fended off a few shady characters in the train station but other than that, things went smoothly.
Once at the hotel we crashed. Hubby and I were exhausted. We slept until about 2 or 3 pm. The 6 hour time difference had really caught up with us. We are still trying to get our bearings regarding the time here vs. the time at home. Our bodies are still on home time but we are operating on Belgium time. After waking from our nap we decided to venture out and get a phone so that we could call home. American cell phones operate on a different frequency so our communication with loved ones was hampered for a while. I was very nervous about that so we made it our mission to take care of that source of stress. Thankfully, finding a phone was pretty simple and inexpensive. We were able to call my babies and all was well. I was a happy mama!
We met up with my intended mother and father and they took us on quite the tour around the area. We had a snack and hubby had Belgium beer (he loved it) and then we walked the streets. The buildings we saw were just unbelievable. I will post pictures when we get back to the states. Finally around 8:30pm or so, we sat down at a beautiful sidewalk restaurant Chez Leon(probably spelled wrong) and had famous Mussels for dinner. Frank even ate some! He even had fish as his main course and LIKED it! I am so very proud of him ;-) Evidently, it is not uncommon to eat very late in Belgium. It didn't even get really dark until about 10pm.
IPs are super nice. I was a bit nervous of how things would go because we had not been able to communicate all that much up until that point. However, the moment we met, I knew they were great people and that this would be a great experience. My IM reported to me they retrieved 10 eggs! I can't wait to help them become parents once more. They informed us that they had bought tickets on the fast train for us to go to Paris. Tears filled my eyes because that to me was just an unbelievable and immensely thoughtful gesture that truly means so much to us! As the days transpire, I will post more. Love you all! xoxo
Once at the hotel we crashed. Hubby and I were exhausted. We slept until about 2 or 3 pm. The 6 hour time difference had really caught up with us. We are still trying to get our bearings regarding the time here vs. the time at home. Our bodies are still on home time but we are operating on Belgium time. After waking from our nap we decided to venture out and get a phone so that we could call home. American cell phones operate on a different frequency so our communication with loved ones was hampered for a while. I was very nervous about that so we made it our mission to take care of that source of stress. Thankfully, finding a phone was pretty simple and inexpensive. We were able to call my babies and all was well. I was a happy mama!
We met up with my intended mother and father and they took us on quite the tour around the area. We had a snack and hubby had Belgium beer (he loved it) and then we walked the streets. The buildings we saw were just unbelievable. I will post pictures when we get back to the states. Finally around 8:30pm or so, we sat down at a beautiful sidewalk restaurant Chez Leon(probably spelled wrong) and had famous Mussels for dinner. Frank even ate some! He even had fish as his main course and LIKED it! I am so very proud of him ;-) Evidently, it is not uncommon to eat very late in Belgium. It didn't even get really dark until about 10pm.
IPs are super nice. I was a bit nervous of how things would go because we had not been able to communicate all that much up until that point. However, the moment we met, I knew they were great people and that this would be a great experience. My IM reported to me they retrieved 10 eggs! I can't wait to help them become parents once more. They informed us that they had bought tickets on the fast train for us to go to Paris. Tears filled my eyes because that to me was just an unbelievable and immensely thoughtful gesture that truly means so much to us! As the days transpire, I will post more. Love you all! xoxo
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Transfer Date is approaching!
Well, less than 24 hours and hubby and I will be heading to Belgium! I had a lining check today and was told my lining was a 10.5! Perfect! It should increase a little more between now and our finally OFFICIAL transfer date of May 10. I am so excited to at last have a date and SO excited to have this opportunity. I must admit nerves are coming into play but I know once we are on the plane I will be fine. I feel really good about the transfer itself. I am taking a break from running around like a mad woman to get all the things done that need to be done when you are leaving three children behind to go an international trip, in order to update you all. To all those IPs out there, I think it would be really helpful if you are considering this to make sure you give your surrogate as much time to plan as possible. Communication is very important. It seems European clinics do things much differently than U.S. clinics in that the dates and orders are given at a moment's notice. I was told yesterday to go in today for an u/s. For a mom and nanny, that is pretty last minute. However, as a surrogate I know that it is all part of the journey. Nothing ever goes as planned and if you are even thinking of being a surrogate...FLEXIBILITY is key. Rolling with the punches has been the name of the game but in the end, it will all be well worth it. The anxiety comes from wanting to have everything done on time and RIGHT on my end. I put my whole heart into my surrogacy but at the same time, I try keeping the balance between being a good surrogate and good mother. Mother's day is coming. I will be away from my children and that is difficult but it is all in the name of helping another woman become a mother once more. That is what surrogacy is all about and what a great lesson for my children! I hope to have internet access while I am in Belgium because I would love to update each day! (((HUGS))) to all! Keep us in your prayers and thoughts for SAFE and happy travels and an embie(s) that STAY PUT!
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